Wednesday, November 23, 2011


For this my nna bros mind nah, im don take picture with Nnenna Minaj. You see I no just understand some guys ohh. Cos you don see bolombolo, your brain go just dey malfunction anyhow.
After listening to so many different conversations over the past few yrs (and yes I was only listening ohh…I wasn’t contributing abeg..make my wife no come kill me juo...ha ha), im be like say Naija guys don dey like boobs pass nyash ohh. And if care is not taken, boobs go soon give nyash a run for its money…ha ha . Cos these days, na so so boobs wey guys just dey talk about whenever they gisting about women.
But make I no lie, afr
aid go dey catch me to take picture with this my aunty for here ohh. Cos the only thing wey I go dey think for my mind be say something fit just enter the babe head, and na so she go just turn to my direction, then come bite my ear or do something very nasty-scary to me :(

Umm..shooo...oops..looks like someone was using her keg as table platform shaa....Una no dey see something like salt untop am? They were probably using her bolombolo to lick the salt and lime after taking some tequila shots :)

umm but Dayum that’s some big a** boobs for real....Chai, only if the face could go through some major re-adjustments here n' there......then she go make sense wellu wellu.
Umm wait...whatta haeck did I just say? ehhhh..urggghhhhh...nnnaaahhhh.. Okay I take that back...maybe I should have replaced that "wellu wellu" to "somehow" or "kinda"


Okay so you guys remember the Oliver twist animation that I posted here some weeks ago. Well the people that made it (AREA) just sent me their latest and last Oliver Twist series. After this one, they will start producing more comedy videos, which should be out in the next few weeks...I cant wait ehh :)

Anyways abeg make una check am out....I watched it, and all i can say is this: VERY FUNNY & CREATIVE. Double Kudos to this AREA people jare.

And also abeg make una check out their facebook page. This way, you will know who they are, and what they do. At least lets all support our fellow Naija peeps with talent and are using it for something positive.!/pages/OurOwnAREA/197667290265388


(pic of Uncle Femi with his last baby mummy)

Our Uncle Femi don give another of im dancers belle ehh. If I could recall, he just had a child like some months ago by one of his other dancers. And this is actually the 3rd dancer that he's planting his seed inside. Mehn this guy na very very strong man, and he shall live very very long ohh..he he. Just to let you guys know, our Uncle Femi already has 5 kids from 4 different women. Three of the ladies each have one, except for the igbo woman amongst them, Munachi, who has two kids for him (ha ha i guess that igbo punani got ma dude whipped…wont be surprised if the babe from Owerri or Enugu..ha ha ). And now this new one now go make am 6 children from 5 different women.

Anyways, as I said earlier, this man na really strong man, and im be like say my guy dey try beat im own pupsi record (although I dont even see that happening, but you never know..ha ha ) This is pretty interesting ohh....This na to remind una say elephant no dey born monkey papa like pikin :)

Well I have nothing much to say, but to hail our Uncle Femi. Everyone has his own life to live, and my guy is definitely living it up jare. As long as money dey, nothing dey happen ehh. But my only problem be say it looks like he didnt learn anything from his father’s death shaa. What happened to protecting yourself with a rubber?

Ummm but wait a minute......No be this same guy wey been dey promote condom at some point back in da days for Naija? I guess someone has been saying one thing and doing another.
Anyways Femi nothing does you juo :)

Anyways RIP Fela....the greatest man to ever come out of Nigeria (in my own perspective shaa)


Looking at this picture alone, you no even need agbara Okija to tell you say something inappropriate dey happen inside that room, and these kids are up to no good too :)

Either dem dey watch one of their guyzes doing bad thing with one girl (make I talk like small pikin..ha ha ), or dem dey watch one naked girl sleeping....Or each person dey wait for their own set :)

This na one of those things wey most boyz suppose don experience somehow during our teenage period (and if you didnt, then sorry for you...cos ur time don pass) ha ha . I remember when I was like 14yrs or so, and I used to go to our boys quarters to go and watch our drivers acting yellow film. I been dey always look through the keyhole, and although I couldn’t see everything through that little hole…but hey, half bread is better than chim-chim ehh. But mehn this life ehhn...its just funny to remember how curious we were during our teenage age. Those days, to watch all those bad bad things go dey sweet us for body anyhow (whether on TV or live), but our only handicap be say we didnt really have access to the right resources you know. Except for some cable channels wey been dey try small during that period (shout out to all my people that used to watch Bravo channel for night back in da days) ha ha. And even when we did have access, somehow somehow there will be an older person (uncle, aunt, guardian, papa, mama, bros sis, nanny) for house wey go just kill our moral finish. And inside my mind, I'll be like "ohhhhhh make this guy commot here nah make I watch this yellow film with ease and happiness" :)

Oya ohh, Back to what I was saying. So even if I guessed wrong about what these guyzes are looking at, well one thing I know for sure for sure be say whatever they are looking at must be something very very interesting and intense too....and definitely something they are not supposed to be looking at. Even sotey dem don dey even touch each other for bodi sef....Nawa ohh.

And there's no way you can tell me that these boys aren’t up to something fishy...if not, person no for take this picture in the first place. And also looking at the scenario, you can see say na batcher house....and we all suppose know by now say nothing holy dey ever happen inside batcher house ;)

(ever watched or heard people having sex? Mehn that shit can make one mad horny ehh....ha ha)

Thursday, November 17, 2011


Labaran Maku, the Minister of Information, has expressed concern over the increase in the number of social media in the country. Mr. Maku made the observation on Tuesday in Benin City during the meeting of members of the Nigeria Union of Journalist (NUJ) Constitutional Review Committee.
Represented by Kingsley Osadolor, a legal practitioner, Mr. Maku said the rise of social media in the country was a phenomenon that needed to be addressed as part of the constitutional amendment or in the nearest future. He said the revolution that was taking place in Egypt, Syria, Libya and other Arab states was as a result of the reports dished out by the social media.
Mr. Maku warned that the increase in the number social media might result in some traditional journalists losing their jobs.
``What business should the social media have with the NUJ? That is an important phenomenon that needs to be considered,'' he said.

Umm... I think this has to be one of the dumbest comments ever made by any Naija Minister...especially when you are a Minister of Information for that matter.

So my question is this: "How the hell did this pant become an information minster???? You see this is what happens when you give people positions which they have no experience whatsoever in. Only in Naija you will see a medical doctor being appointed as a Minister of finance, or an accountant being appointed as a minister of the heck does these things relate to each other for freaking goodness sake? Majority of these ministers are given positions that are not related to their field in any way. Just beacuse you want to put your person in the system doesnt mean you should give them any sensitive position, which they have no idea/experience in. This is one of the reasons sh** doesn’t work in that country.

For a whole Minister of Information to come out and say such fuckery...that’s just Ludacris for real. Or this tout no know say na actually im Oga, uncle Johny, wey dey even use social media pass us self. Everytime my guy dey for Facebook laying out one agenda/economic policies or the other. I remember that first time when our lovely uncle Johny opened a facebook account and started putting up positive and optimistic status, everybody go just dey hail am, and praising him for his ideas and plans to make Nigeria great once again. But since people have realized that he's all "talk and no action," na so guyz don dey vex nah. These days whenever he puts up a status, na so people go dey curse am from left right center. Well Uncle Goody, I guess you cannot blame us for all the negative comments on your facebook status shey? Cos no be motivational speech wey we go chop. We need actions jare.

And this fool dey there dey talk about NUJ (Naija union of Journalists)...I never even knew that body still existed sef. The last time I even heard name was probably in my social studies class in primary school. Well  I'm guessing afraid don dey catch these our so called leaders cos they know say one day one day, we Naija people will come out and say "enough is enough." (I dont know when that day will come shaa). You see I was a huge fan of Uncle Johny and I believe he was the chosen one that will change Nigeria for good. But I'm beginning to change my mind small small. So far, there have been no major changes since he entered office, instead things are even getting worse in our beloved country. And the fact that he has surrounded himself with stack illiterates like this one right here, doesn’t even help matters.

Minister of Information ni!!....what a douchebag.....smchew :)



 So this Nollywood actress Rukky Sanda (I've never even heard of this chick till today sef) underwent a plastic surgery....and she went on to twitter to defend herself about her decision.
Okay so before I used to be against people doing plastic surgery, implants, lipo and every other surgeries in order to make them look good and appreciate their body. I remember me and my wife used to argue about this topic. But over the years, I've changed my opinion and decided not to judge people. Yes we should all be happy with the way God made every one of us, but at the same time, I now feel there's nothing wrong in trying to correct a particular part of your body, especially if it's something that makes you feel uncomfortable with the way you look. Lets be for real here, I'm sure most of us have one particular part of our body that we would change, if we were given the opportunity to do so. I feel one of the worst things that can happen to anyone is not being comfortable with your own body/looks, which inturn, makes you always self conscious and inferior (esp when you surrounded by correct guyzes and girlzes). So if you have the money to correct that particular flaw of yours, then why not nah? Or will you continue to remain self conscious and mad at your body/looks for the rest of your life? for wetin nah. If you not happy with yourself, then I wonder what you gonna be happy about then. As for me, if to say I get one particular part of my body that I dont like, I go change that thing if I get money...but unfortunately I dont. So thankGod I dont have to deal with such problem..he he

Well back to what I was saying.....So this was what she recently posted on her twitter account. (And speaking of twitter account, I'll soon be opening one ohh....thanks to all the pressure from my friends. So I'll let you guys know when I open one...and abeg make una follow me. This way you will be getting the latest stuff about all the crazy sh** that be going through this my brain on a daily basis)

Umm okay ohh aunty Rukky take am easy...nobody dey fight you nah. Yes I totally support what you saying. But in my own perspective, I believe it only becomes a sin when:

This is my advice to my people who are thinking of doing some type of surgery in the future: If you cannot afford a reputable/experienced plastic surgeon, then fogerrrrit. Cos you dont wonna come out of that operating room loooking like our aunty Rukky. You dont wonna have that reaction when they give you a mirror to look at your new self, and immediately inside your mind, you gonna be like WHAATTAA F**K??. But at the same time you go dey console your self, saying "Its not bad shaa." And you try to convince or force yourself to like it. But you know deep deep deep inside your mind, you still saying WTF DID I JUST DO?!!... ha ha.  I'm sure we've all had this type of "consoling ourselves" experience before in various incidents. I usually get this mostly when I get a haircut that I dont like. ha ha

Anyways I felt she was a very fine chick before the surgery. Dont you guys think so? But now, I think she's more of a beautiful man..ooops sorry I mean she-male, after the surgery :)
Aunty Rukky abeg no mind wetin these haters dey talk. Carry go. Nothing do you and your plastic face jare.


Yeah so remember last month I told you guys I was going to throw a big birthday party for me and my wife, and I was going to post the pics here later. Well, I was hoping to capture some great moments during the party, but unfortunately I was too high and tipsy to even know where my camera was...ha ha I just luv me eh. So these are some of the few pictures which my wife took with here iphone (yeah iphone is the sh** and I hope to get one sometime when I grow up. f**k BB ..ha ha)

Anyways the party was so much fun. I had over 100 people show up. ThankGod I have a loft apartment which was able to accomodate all that amount of people. One of my celebrity neighbors brought some of his celebrity friends who were actors...We had two DJs, and I gave them some of the latest Naija songs to play during the party, and they were loving the songs. Sotey one of the Dj's came up to me and told me to download all my Naija songs from my laptop for him, cos that was the first time he was hearing Nigerian music, and he was going crazy over our songs. Shekpe just full everywhere and people just dey shayo dey go. both guyzes and girlzes ohh. I even set up my two big hookahs, and people were just smoking that thing like say tomorrow no dey. Infact at a point I dont think there was any sober person in the building (except my wife I believe). Almost everyone was intoxicated...and una already know what comes next after drinking a lot shey.....Horniness/Hunger :)  Yeah thats right...cos according to my law, the more you drink, the hornier/hungrier you get ;)  A lot of people began to show their true colors when that alcohol began to kick in their system. Boyz their eyes just dey red anyhow where dem dey find woman. Even the women too their eye come dey show green light too. But yeah its just crazy to see wetin alcohol fit do person eh. That sh** can make you become the boldest nukka in town eh...ha ha

At the end of the day, It was such a great party, and everyone started telling me to throw another one for the new years eve. Na im I just dey laugh inside my mind dey talk "this people think say na to dey throw party wey I come do for obodo onyibo shey? When I never find money wey I go even use buy ticket to go Naija, then na to throw another party in less then 3 months shey?"  We Naija people too like grooving jare. Even some of my foreign friends came up to me and where like "Damn you guys know how to party for real." HA HA. You gotta love us ehh!!
Anyways click below to see the pics....nothing does any of una jare (yeah and thats me after the party with my own personal cake...yeah I'm greedy like that)

Tuesday, November 15, 2011


I just saw this post online, and I found it very interesting and worth reading. This is because its pretty much sums up everything that I always say, when it comes to Obodo Onyibo. This is definitely something that we Naija peeps should read (esp those ones trying to come down here)  Anyways enjoy :)

Are you thinking of migrating to the United States?

Written by Sabella Ogbobode Abidde

Whether you believe in the Biblical account or in the evolutionary theory of creation, humans have always migrated. In other words, migration has always been part of the human experience. Migration can be internal or across borders. Over time, we have seen several migration patterns. In Africa for instance, there was the Bantu migration; and in Europe, there was the Serb and the Irish migrations, including the German’s eastward expansion that is generally referred to as the Ostsiedlung Migration. In the United States, there was, between 1910 and 1970, the exodus of African-Americans out of the Southern Belt to other regions of the country.

And why do people migrate? Well, there are several sociological theories that attempt to explain migration. Nonetheless, there are two basic hypotheses that explain this phenomenon: the pull and push factors of migration. Simplified, the pull theory says there are factors abroad that pull people to leave their homeland, i.e. uniting with spouse or other family members, and also, the prospect of economic and social opportunities abroad. On the other spectrum are the push factors, i.e. escape from political and other forms of persecution, ecological disasters, wars and searing poverty at home.

In more recent times – and especially in the case of Nigeria – people migrate because of the shrinking political and economic space; and also because of the searing poverty and the wanton lack of government services that have come to characterise Nigeria. In the last three decades, at least, Nigeria has become a very difficult place for the young, the restless, and the enterprising to realise their goals and ambition. At the very least, the cost of realising such goals and ambition gets exorbitant and frustrating every passing year. Why, the argument goes, would any sane person want to remain in a country that stifles dreams and ingenuity? You remain, it seems, only if you want your life and your talent, wasted.

Between 1950 and 1980 or thereabout, the most popular destination for Nigerians wishing to migrate outside of the African continent was the United Kingdom. There are several reasons for this; but the most obvious reason was Nigeria’s colonial ties with Great Britain. And within the West African-sub region, it was Ghana. Again colonial linkage comes to play. Even today, it is reasonable to say that Ghana is the preferred destination for Nigerians who seek refuge abroad. Outside of the continent, however, the United States of America seems to have replaced Britain. There are several reasons for this. However, the most obvious is the fact that the US offers more economic, political and social opportunities.

There are historical documents to show that for centuries people have been flocking to the US to seek sanctuary. Others came in search of a better life. In all, there have been four waves of migration: from 1600 or thereabout until 1820; the second wave began in the 1820s through the 1870s. But, the heaviest period of migration was from the 1880s through the 1920s when an estimated 25 million immigrants made the US their home. The fourth wave began in 1965. In the case of Nigerians, it is safe to say that the migration, in very high numbers, began in the 1980s. And it hasn’t abated.

In spite of the allure of the US, life is not as rosy and as smooth as prospective immigrants think. That is to say that life in America is not as is sometimes portrayed to those Nigerians who dream of crossing the oceans, or the Sahara Desert, to this part of the world. There are two Americas. For a good number of Nigerians, life in America can be tough; it can inflict both physical and mental pain. For many of us, it can be disorienting. It weighs on the soul and saps ones energies. It is neither a painting nor a picture; but more like a series of never-ending nightmares. For the lazy, the unlucky or the unrealistic ones, life in America can be likened to a whirlwind of shattered dreams or unmet expectations. For these unfortunate ones, life in America can become a source of sadness, deep-seated anger and mental depression.

On the other continuum is the second America: a land of inexhaustible opportunities. It is indeed the land for those who are daring and have the courage to extend frontiers. It is the land that rewards those who work hard and smart. It is the land that rewards those who persevere and keep going even when they fail. It is the land of law and order, of those who believe in due process. America is the land of God and gods, a land for the believers and non-believers. It is the land of dream merchants, of fabulists, tale-spinners; and of the high and low achievers. It is also the land of pipedreams, broken dreams and untold anguishes.

From my own vantaged point, there are four types of Nigerians here: those who are truly living the American Dream; and the middle incomers who live a steady but banal lifestyle. But the vast majority of Nigerians live almost on the margins: no extra disposable income, no fat bank account or investment portfolios, and no annual vacation to top tourist destinations. But for the grace of extra income, they’d fall off the slope. And finally, there are those Nigerians, for whom life can be cruel.

When very many Nigerians come home on their periodic visits, they do so, in many cases, after several months and/or years of financial planning. They have to because they have bills to pay. And in the 2-4 weeks they spend in Nigeria, they have to be sure they do not overspend, otherwise, they’d go broke. And you never ever want to be broke in Nigeria (if you are visiting from America). Not quite a secret but let me tell you: Most Nigerians I know would rather return home permanently. But many can’t. Others won’t. In the minds of many, how to contend with uncertainties of electricity, potable water, fetid environmental conditions, armed robbers and many other deficits, is the nagging question. For instance, many know that dogs and cats in rural Alabama receive better medical care than most human beings in Nigeria.

And so, as you plan and prepare to migrate, you must critically and carefully weigh all your options. Do you want to leave the familiar for the unknown? Do you really want to? There are several great things about America, i.e. security and the availability of human needs (water, education, healthcare, food, etc). But are you ready to live in a country that can be lonely and individualistic? There are many things the average Nigerian values, but he or she will not find those things in the US. And are you ready to leave all that you know and love and cherish to start life all over again? Frankly, if you have attained certain status, it might not be wise to migrate. Just visit, if you can.

May I also say that if you have very low tolerance for failures and mistakes, it might not be wise for you to migrate. If you think the world owes you, or have low tolerance for abuse and disappointments, you might as well not migrate. In the end though, nothing I or anyone else says matters. The decision to migrate – to engage in a journey that can be unpredictable – is basically yours. We all must go in search of our dreams. For some of us, our dreams lie at home; but for others, it can only be found overseas. At home or abroad…good luck!

Tuesday, November 8, 2011


A 51 year old Nigerian-born UK resident nurse, Omolayo Abayomi, has had her Nurse's licence withdrawn by the UK Nursing and Midwifery Council for throwing her hands into the air and begging for Jesus to help, as a baby she was supposed to be taking care of suffered a heart attack.

According to Daily Mail UK, Omolayo Abayomi 'panicked' when the child, who suffered from a chronic lung disease, turned blue and stopped breathing in his cot at home. The nurse called for divine intervention more than 20 times before the vulnerable boy's mother told her to 'shut up'.
The nurse was constantly saying "Jesus help him" and waving her arms around,' a hearing was told.

ATTENTION to all my Naija peeps in Naija:

When you about to travel out of Naija in order to go find greener pastures in the Western world, you better drop some of your ridiculous religious beliefs back at the airport.....cos dem sh** wont save your a** once you cross that Atlantic ocean.

You a freaking resident nurse and you see your patient dying, and instead of you to take necessary measures in order to prevent further disaster... u dey there dey call God name. Like he's gonna come down and perform a miracle, just cos your lazy a** didn’t know what to do? Ofcourse there are some situations where you have no option but to leave it to God to take care of (after you have done your own part ohh). But I dont know why we just have this mentality that God must come down and do every freaking thing for us. Then why did he give us brain then? He might as well have put fufu inside our brain nah...or made us all airheads. But he knew that if he didnt give us brain, we go just become his parasites forever....which unfortunately most of us still are :)

At least if she tried to act fast and take necessary measures in order to help the child survive, then I'm sure this wouldn’t have been news. But the woman dey there dey call God for expedited intervention. And I could just imagine how she was doing it too. Probably closing her eyes, walking up and down the room, snapping her fingers, making very serious/ugly facial expressions, praying loud and spicing the whole room up with saliva (such a typical Naija prayer format)

Anyways time don reach wey we gats dey use our brains for real. No be every small thing wey happen wey we go just dey call God up and down. I wasn’t surprised when I saw this tho. This is what you expect when you can get a Doctor or nursing degree in Naija in just a few yrs, when compared to getting it in the western world. We got no adequate training whatsoever. Instead to hand out degree na the only thing we sabi. So why wouldn’t she start praying to God, since she doesnt know WTF she's was gonna do.

For Naija ehnn, when you see some of these so called doctors or nurses, and when they open their mouth and speak, sometimes I'm like "how da f**k did this nukka get his degree for Christ sake?" I remember when I was in secondary school, I had this crazy pain on my lower left part of my stomach. And when we went to see the doctor, do you know my mum didnt even finish telling him my experience, and this doctor immediately concluded "Its appendix and we will take him to the operating room asap, because the thing is deadly" ?????????????? Mind you no test whatsoever was taken on me ohh...and the guy don already conclude say na appendix. If no be say I'm lucky to have a smart a** mum, dem for don go tear tear my belle finish that same day... all in the name of appendix kwo? But she was hesitant and we later found out it wasn’t even anything close to appendix. It was just an unusual stomach pain.

Its so painful to see that we are brought up in a society where we dont wonna use our brains to take certain decisions anymore. Instead we feel God is always there to do smth for us...NA NUKKA. Sh** doesnt work like that. And trust me, that’s one of the major things killing us in Naija. This woman don go fall our hand for thia now. Well If she’s a citizen, then she go enjoy some good time for Jail. But if she’s a non-British citizen, then she should be happy cos she will be getting a free transportation to the airport, and a free flight back to Naija. How lucky she will be..especially now wey ticket fare dey very expensive :)


Congrats to the one and only Duncan Mighty. My guy just purchased a Rolce Royce Phantom, and marked it with a plate number "PH 1st SON"

Nothing does you jare. Enjoy ur life. Afterall you worked for it. But this life dey funny ohh. This was a guy that a few yrs ago, he had absolutely nothing. This goes to show you that you should never look down on anyone. Today you can be nothing, and the next day, you don blow scatter.

When I was in Naija in March, I had the opportunity to meet this dude one day in PH, for one of my guyzes studio..... I remember him telling us he was just coming from gov't house, and Governor Amaechi gave him N150 milla, in order to organize the concert in PH which he brought in all the famous Naija artists to come perform. He's indisputably one very talented artist, mad mad kool, and very humble too. That was the day I even found out that he actually produces his own songs. Which means he makes his own beats, writes his own freaking songs and produces it all by himself. Therefore the more money in the bank for him :)

And I can guarantee you that this is the only guy in PH that can come out and drive this Rolce Royce in PH with no security whatsoever…and no one will even think of kidnapping or harming him. Why? Cos he's loved by everyone in PH. You need to see the way people luv this guy in PH ehh. Even during the concert night, the crowd was trying to fight the security guys and cause serious wahala. Different People came on stage trying to calm the crowd, but they got even more violent. But immediately they went to bring Duncan Mighty to come out and talk to them….mehn everybody just listened to him. I remember when he came out on stage to address the angry crowd, the first thing he said was “If I do you do you” then the crowd just went bananas and replied “if I do you wrong before, sorry ehh, I no dey perfect ehh.” Mehn that shit just made everyone calm down. That sh** was so powerful and it really gave me an insight of how influential musicians are. It was just a memorable night for real. So as I was saying, my guy is really PH 1st son ehh, and he’s good to go eh.

Keep up the good work and keep on making hit songs for us to dance to juo. God bless you my man...with your crazy crazy crazzzzzzy looking self :)


So since our government have been unable to take care of its people, I'm guessing some guyzes don dey go find various measures in order to make ends meet. And our northern brothers have once again proved to us that for the fact say you dey see most of them dey do meguard/aboki/indomie/tea...that no mena say dem be dummies ohh...ha ha   So some people came up with a plan to build a house with bottes..........!!!!?????????? yea u heard me in all those coke and eva wine bottle them wey all of una dey drink dey throway anyhow ;)

“This is the first house in Africa built from bottles, which could go a long way in solving Nigeria’s huge housing need and cleaning the badly polluted environment,” project initiator Christopher Vassiliu said during a tour of the building.

Okay ohh....Bottle house ke? Ha ha ..I like how they trying to make it look like "yeah bottle house is gonna be the koolest thing in years to come."  Like say the house will be looking so modern and ajebo-ish shey? Imagine someone telling you "I live in the bottle house estate." I dont know bout u guys, but as for me, my response go be "bottle gini? WTF are you talking about"
Anyways great concept tho...and this na the kind things wey suppose be news least smth positive...kinda :)   Good to see that some of our people are using their brain for smth positive.
But at the end of the day, its still a freaking "bottle house" Kudos to whoever brought about this idea juo..nothin did you :)



OK I THINK ITS HIGH TIME NAIJA SHOULD BE SEPARATED. Cos nothing positive has come out of Nigeria. Instead its been religious conflicts here and there, claiming hundreds of thousands of innocent lifes. If nothign has been done to stop these various religious violence over the years, then I dont think anything will work now. Therefore In order to save the lifes of innocent people and stop this whole religious crisis, I hereby support the division of Naija...make everybody do dey go im papa house jare....before these people use all of us do suya. Afterall no be by force say two people wey no like each other must continue to live under one roof....this is just absolutely ridiculous. A country where life is worth  nothing...what a shame!!

Friday, November 4, 2011


(Shout out to my sis, chichi Orji for providing this crazy a** pic)

Animal Cruelty...check!! Over loading....check!!  Fuel exposure....check!!
 Okay ohh.....people wey dey go village….I don see una nah. And I can guarantee u say if u look inside that moto, you go see nothing less than 7 humans sitting in various uncomfortable styles, but I bet they happy shaa.......with an extra ram on someone’s lap.

One of the major problems about Naija is that we have zero safety measures. Every time, na so so gov't we go dey blame for everything. But the honest truth be say we too no dey help ourselves at all. The last thing you will see in any Western world is a car that is terribly overloaded...talkless of even having an animal inside boot. Why won’t our cars life span be too short, when we dey pack things wey heavy pass the car, inside the car itself? Now if this car come get some kind of serious accident, or fire come catch am, everybody go come out dey cry, dey talk say na usual.

My peeps as much as I put some of these pics for fun, but at the same time we should be aware that most of these crazy stunts we be pulling in Naija is very dangerous, and a lot of people have died as a result of having that "I dont care" or "nothing go happen" or "God dey" attitude. Abeg if you dey Naija, and u see an overloaded bus or car, no enter ehh. Cos if we keep on having this "God is in control" attitude, then a lot of us will continue to disappear from the face of the Earth very early. Afterall heaven dey help those wey dey help themselves jare. You cannot put all this sh** in your car, and have the nerves to open your dirty a** mouth to tell me "God is in Control" THAT'S SOME SERIOUS BULLSH** FOR REAL!!

Sometimes I dey tire for we Naija peeps ohh.....U know say u dey do smth wey fit cost u ur life, but yet you dey talk say “God is in control” ke? Other people that have died through accident as a result of things like this....who been tell u say God no love them too? So what makes you think u special, and believe say Angel Michael dey for front of your car with sword, then Garbiel, Uriel and Raphael dem go dey for back and corners dey protect your wrecked a** car? Cos u don turn to Daniel for den shey?

That saying "Common sense is not common.” Na now I dey see say that quote really make sense, and I think it should become a subject that should be taught in all our educational institutions across Naija. Hopefully this way, we will slowly eliminate the ignorant and animalistic/babaric behavior that most of us possess.

And I'm pretty sure that ram was like "make dem kukuma come kill me nahhh..which kind extra torture be this one ke?...f**k this sh** jare.  ha ha


You see my people, e dey very very unfortunate say majority of we Naija peeps still dey fall for this type of sh**. You secretly hire some people to come to your church, and they start acting like wild dogs...all in the name of "holy spirit dey catch them." WTF is wrong with people YO!! No be today this thing start, but yet people still dey believe all these bullsh**. Don’t get me wrong ohh, I'm not saying there are no real situations like this out there ohh. But just as I always say, 99% of Naija pastors are all full of BULLSHIT!!!!..and yes i fully spelt the whole word this time around, cos thats what they truly are.....PURE FRAUDSTARS. Infact I would prefer a Yahoo person any day over these stupid a** self-proclaimed pastors.

What even amazes me the most is that even when some of these fake pastors have been exposed, you will be expecting to see a lot of people leave the church. But lye lye ehh. That’s even when some people will support the pastor to the fullest sef. A pastor is being exposed for either having sex with the married women in his church, all in the name of spiritual uplifting. Or he stole money, or he was using charms....and mind you, there's full evidence to show that he actually committed the crime ohh. But yet you will see grown ass people that should be able to tell whats right and wrong, coming out to support him. And the crazy thing is that most of these people claim to have travelled far and wide, well exposed, got all types of educational degrees and sh**. But yet dem go dey fall zombie just for the basic stuff that even a 5 yr old can figure out. I dont just get it.

For Naija, if you no go church on Sunday, people go dey look you like say you be devil himself. We are so caught up with this whole religion thing that it has really eaten our brains badly. Some people never miss Sunday church service before sef...and yet anytime you see them, nothing has changed in their freaking life. You see them wear same sh** to church every Sunday (with no deodorant on them) they not moving forward...instead they looking hungrier than ever. Why? COS THEY GIVING THEIR WHOLE FREAKING MONEY TO THEIR SO CALLED PASTOR, who inturn, uses it to buy a Hummer jeep and living the good life. And later these so called pastors go stand for pulpit and open their rusty mouth and preach to you that "you shouldn’t focus on the material things of the world." REALLY? LIKE REALLY SON???

Infact I no wan start to vex this Friday, make this whole issue no come mess up my weekend jare :)   It just sucks to see how easy our people can be manipulated by these thugs called pastors, all in the name of Christ. Infact you know what? I think I'll have to make some trips to a couple of Naija churches next time I go back. And I can’t wait for the pastor/prophet/bishop/apostle to call me out to prophesy to me, (U know say dem like to dey target any new member wey come) and anything wey im tell me, I go just dey tell am "my friend I dont think you are getting your prophecy right. The one I can’t even wait for am to happen na if im make mistake wan touch my head or touch me in general all in the name of “trying to put the holy spirit in me”....I will so slap the living sh** out of his hand. And I'm very serious about this ohh...cos it’s about time somebody needs to use one of these a**holes to set an example.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011


HA HA be honest tho, this is so so so true. I guess that’s one of the biggest benefits of we Naija (African) peeps coming to live/school in Obodo onyibo. Over the years, I've always wondered why the Western world really makes we Naija peeps look very fresh whenever we get a chance to go live/study over there. Is it their food? Or their weather? Or their lack of hardship? I'm thinking it’s all of the above shey ;)

Okay you think say I dey just wan talk? Alright then, think of all the crazy looking people that you knew back in secondary school...and this includes peeps who's faces look rumpled, or peeps that look like they malnourished, or peeps that look like they be doing farm work on a 24/7 basis. When these peeps manage to travel to Obodo Onyibo (esp Yankee & Jand) and spend a couple of years there…..when they come back to Naija, I swear you can def tell the difference. Even sef it’s so obvious that if a person enter Naija now and walk on the street, people can def. tell that you just came from Obodo Onyibo. I remember when  me and two of my guyzes from Yankee came back to Naija in February, everywhere we went to, people go just dey look us...people go dey call us Yankee boys, while some guys go dey call us sweet looking boyz (u see if no be say I know say our Naija guys no mean am in a gay way, I for don seriously ask them who dem dey call "sweet looking"…cos that’s so gay….ha ha ). Although I no go lie, sometimes we spoke in Yankee accent (una know say me be truth talker nah) But trust me, it was very unintentional...and I dont mean speaking in slangs like calling water, "warer" ohh….abeg abeg abeg I’m not into such fake life jare. But that wasnt the case, cos even when we went to clubs, some bold peeps will come up to us and ask if we from Yankee. So I’m guessing its more of the looks and swag....he eh

So I decided to ask some of of my peeps for Naija how dem dey take identify person wey just come back from Obodo Onyibo. While a few were giving blah blah answers like “wearing earrings or having tattoos (which I felt was ridiculous, cos nowadays so many guys for Naija dey wear earrings, and a lot of females and males don dey get tattoo….and yet these people have never travelled outside Naija) majority of them said "na the freshness of the skin and facial looks too…. HA HA

As much as this is mad funny, it’s still true talk tho. But I just find it amazing how some peeps for Naija go fit identify person wey just dey come from Obodo Onyibo shaa. No be small talent be this ohh :) Well, a perfect example would be me (u know I love cracking jokes at myself sometimes) When I came to school here in 2003, I was looking all skinny and crazy looking, and by the time I went back to Naija for Christmas in 2004, I looked totally different. Even all the guys that looked big and buff back in secondary school days, now looked like little kids to me. Even me sef come dey fear myself eh, cos I really did change drastically (thanks to the food, gym and facial hair..ha ha) I believe its def. the hormones they put in their food that makes peeps get big and mature quick tho. Cos then in my 1st yr of college, almost all the American kids that were my age don already get bia-bia full for their face...and me still dey do night vigil just to even get at least one strand for my chin. Na so I just dey greet some of these guys, without knowing say I be either their mate, or I even senior them sef. But later shaa, I come dey believe myself jare..boys come dey mature well, dey big, dey fine wellu wellu. Im no mean say I no been fine when I been dey Naija ohh. I’ve always been a fine bomboy, but I just needed something in order to bring out the main beauty in me…..wink wink.

Isnt it so funny how when some peeps go back Naija, dem no go wan stay under sun for even 5 mins. And when you ask them why? Dem go tell you “cos it will make them dark, and thereby losing the freshness of their skin.” As much as I understand where they coming from, but at the end of the day, I still find such reasoning very pathetic.

Anyways I still believe that the Western world is one of the toughest place to live (esp Yankee and Jand) and I always try as much as possible to let my friends know this, but yet most of dem no wan believe, and dem wan come see am for themselves (and I no blame them at all shaa). And trust me, I'm planning on moving back to Naija by the middle of next yr. (cos believe it or not, the best place to make money faster is in Naija). But one thing I know that any Naija/African person will benefit from the western world is the availability of excellent social amenities, as well as their food, and their weather.

ATTENTION: These changes I dey talk about actually depends on the individual ohh....cos most times if you a really crazy looking individual...even if u like, make you live for Yankee for 100 yrs.....U AINT CHANGING SH**. You still gonna be the same crazy looking guy everyone knows. And even when you tell peeps say you just dey come from Obodo Onyibo, dem no go believe u ehh. Matter of fact, im get the way you go even tell people say you from Yankee, and dem go even beat you join sef….cos dem go feel say you dey play with their intelligence…ha ha

Once again, Thank you Obodo Onyibo for actually bringing out the hidden beauty in some of us. And If you one of those people, can I hear a YAY :)

And If u one of those peeps living in Obodo Onyibo (esp for more than 2yrs) and you still havent had any drastic change in your looks in general...well, I'm sorry….cos its never gonna happen then :(
But wait I think you should still say YAY shaa….cos bad as im bad, at least you should be grateful that you are in obodo onyibo too. So lets say YAY to that ;)


So last 2 days was Halloween. I used to celebrate it back in my University days, but ever since I've been with my wife, she has prevented me from not celebrating it, since she doesnt believe in it and stuff like that. And I see where she's coming from shaa, so therefore I've decided that me and my family will not be celebrating Hallowen in any way. Be it dressing up or going out for trick or treating. Although when Halloween comes, I usually wish I could dress up shaa :(

 Anyways so I saw a lot of crazy costumes and sh** that night. ThanksGod my apt. complex has a buzz door, so this way I didnt have to bother about kids coming into the building and knocking on my door.... doing the whole "trick or treat..aksing me for candy and blah blah blah blah.
Anyways so two Naija peeps decided to do show us their own halloween costume. And after seeing this picture the only thing I gotta say is



You see even if I'm to go to a church in Naija, It def. has to be a church owned by nobody....good example would be like an Anglican church or so.
Cos as far as I dey concerned, 99% of all these new generation churches are all FUCKERY
FUCKERY......... FUCKERY........................... as in F**KING